The whole world seems to be in relationships. All my friends are in relationships except me. And I just don’t get it. I’ve tried online dating and going to the pub, but no one has caught my eye.
It feels like there’s not a single guy out there who wants me in his life.
It does feel like I’ll never get married or have kids, which is something I’m not willing to give up on. But am I just being selfish? Is it okay for me to remain single forever?
Is It Bad For Me To Remain Single Forever?
There seems to be a stigma attached to those who don’t have relationships, but they’re actually healthy in many ways, and it’s totally natural for everyone not to want or need relationships. In fact, the experts recommend people remain single longer and more often than not.
Those with a healthy lifestyle and self-esteem who have maintained a high quality of life while single (desiring no relationship) are happier, more fulfilled, and more successful in every area of their lives. Being single also causes people to be more honest about what they want in relationships and communicate better.
Eighty percent of the military who opt to serve as career officers do so voluntarily and because they’re interested in going overseas for long tours of duty. Clearly, people are not required to be in a relationship.
Is It Unhealthy To Be Single?
As long as you have self-esteem and a healthy lifestyle, it is very healthy to be single. People who are single live longer, have more money and are happier.
Being completely alone is actually good for people because you don’t have to compromise your standards just to make someone else happy or feel accepted.
When a person is in a relationship, they’re constantly trying to change themselves if they think the other person doesn’t like them for who they really are.
But when you’re single, you can be whoever you want to be, and no one will judge you or try to change you because they love the real you. It’s much healthier to be true to yourself.
Are Single People Happier?
According to research, over half of all marriages will end in divorce. Over eighty percent of people do not want to be in their current relationship, and only twenty percent of the population is happy in their marriage. In fact, it’s been proven that being single is statistically better for most people and leads to a happier life.
In addition, being in a relationship can cause people to lose touch with their friends and families because they spend more time with their significant others. Having a partner distracts them from other important things in their lives that may make them happier.
When you’re happy with your life, you enjoy living it even more when you’re single, which makes you even happier.
What To Do When All My Friends Are In Relationships Except Me?
If you have a lot of friends and family members in relationships, respect the choices they’ve made. It’s not your fault your friends don’t have time for you or think you’re a loser because they’re not single and possibly miserable their whole lives. Just because everyone else is together doesn’t mean it’s for you and that no one else would like to be alone too.
You might want to rethink that whole “friend” thing because being single sounds way better than being with someone who always wants to change who you are so they can be happy in their situation.
Maybe you don’t want to be with someone who drags you down, but what if you wanted a person who wanted to change themselves so they could be a good fit for you?
People always want or need someone who wants to change, and their happiness is the most important thing.
I’ve tried going out with friends, but I can’t seem to find one that actually wants me for me.
What Do I Do About My Loneliness?
Since this article is about being single and not getting involved in relationships, all the suggestions are geared toward people who don’t want or need relationships. In fact, all of these suggestions may or very well may not apply to you. But here are some suggestions if you are interested in being a loner and want to prevent yourself from becoming lonely:
- Stay home and do things by yourself. Take a bath, read a book, watch a movie, etc. Take some time for yourself each day and do things that make you happy just because . . . it’s good for your soul.
- Get to know yourself better. Spend time with people who like the real you; they will appreciate you more than anyone else could, even if they’re not in relationships.
- Be honest with yourself. Know what your standards are, what you’re willing to accept, and what you’re not willing to put up with in a relationship.
- Get to know your friends even better. Spend time with people who are like-minded and want the same things out of life as you do because that’s who is going to get more out of life with you for longer no matter if they’re in relationships or not . . . unless they don’t want to be single forever.
- Stop watching so much television. This is how most people spend their free time when they’re alone, and it’s a waste of time that could be used for something more productive in their lives – themselves.
- Learn to say no and set limits by saying “no” to things that you can’t or will not do. This is a good way to force people to respect you, which makes the rest of your life a lot easier. You will be able to say no more easily when you have something in mind that needs to be done, and this way, your friends won’t have time for things they don’t want or need, like you.
- Enjoy the company of others but don’t get so involved that they’re going to think they have an obligation to keep you (a relationship).
- Be active and get out in the community, even if it’s just walking alone, going shopping, or driving through town.
- Don’t forget the rest of humanity when you’re alone. There are more people in the world like you and don’t have any friends or family either. Be a friend to them, and they might be able to be a friend to you in return.
- Don’t always think of yourself as being alone because there are a lot more things in this world besides “being” that would like to make your acquaintance.
The Bottom Line
So, in closing, being single can be as great as it is awful, but it’s ultimately up to the person who chooses not to be involved with anyone at all. Why not be who you want to be and don’t let someone else make you change for them or themselves?
Being single is the worst way to live if you’re a people pleaser because it’s basically lonely, has no one in your life, and has no reason to live. But being alone can be better in the long run if you learn how to say “no” and appreciate the company of others who are like-minded to you.
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