This blog post is about my girlfriend wants to get married or break up. If you find yourself in a similar situation, I hope it helps. You’re probably wondering: why?
I’ve been dating my girlfriend for two and a half years. We were friends at first and didn’t date until recently.
A couple of months ago, she told me she wanted to marry soon to have children. As we talked about it more, I realized that marriage is where I want to be at some point in the future, but not now.
I remember when we had this talk, she asked what would happen if the relationship ended now because of this disagreement in timing- and I said, “if it ends now, then it will end because of something else unrelated to our disagreement on marriage.”
We’ve gotten around to discussing the future of our relationship. She wants children as soon as possible, so I asked when she thought she wanted children. “Maybe five years?” I told her I wanted to wait until we married before having children.
She has a plan and assumptions about our marriage, but I want my own plans and ideas first. However, the more we talked about it, the lower my chances of getting married, which is where this blog post came from.
Table of Contents
5 Reasons Why Does She Want To Get Married So Fast?
1. She’s Not Sure I’ll Be Around For The Long-Term
She doesn’t want me to change in the future and for us to break up because it was a “mistake.” She thought getting married would close that possible door.
2. Obligation
She thinks we should get married because that’s what people do in our stage of life, and if we don’t, then what if we break up? What will our family think and say?
How will people talk about us behind our back? She worries about how society would judge us for taking a different path and think she made a “mistake.”
3. She Wants To Be Married
She wants to move on from our current relationship because it isn’t fulfilling enough for her or what other people expect from a relationship or marriage. She wants to be married for the benefits and security of a relationship.
4. She Wants To Have Children
She wants children because it’s what women do in our society; society expects it from her. She worries about not getting married if I don’t want children and how people will talk about her behind her back if we don’t do the same thing they do.
5. She Wants The Security Of Marriage
She wants marital security and benefits because that’s what people in our stage of life want/expect from their relationships and marriage as well as what other people would think about them for taking a different path.
Girlfriend Wants To Get Married Or Break Up: What Should I Do?
I had a couple of different options to approach this situation:
1. Keep Her As A Girlfriend And Stay Single
Get married and move on. She’ll be miserable, and so will I if we end up breaking up because of something other than our disagreement on marriage.
2. Tell Her To Get Married
This option isn’t the best- but it’s my last option; it isn’t necessarily the right choice. If she doesn’t want to get married, tell her that she needs to get married before something bad happens in our relationship, like cheating or divorce.
3. Get Married
Get married and move on. She’ll be unhappy, and I’ll be unhappy as well if something bad happens in the relationship that made us break up or she gets to the point where she doesn’t want to be with me anymore.
4. Break Up
Tell her we need time apart from each other because I need to think about what I want out of a relationship and make my own plans for marriage and raising children before settling down with her – even if it means ending our current relationship forever.
How Do I Tell My Girlfriend I’m Not Ready For Marriage?
Say, “I’m not married yet. I want to get to know you more and plan our future together before we get married.” Be reserved and honest with her. Tell her that you want to decide what marriage is for you first, meaning when you are ready for it.
There isn’t a specific timeframe, but there is a point in your life where you will be ready for marriage (or at least when it comes up as a requirement).
Should I Break Up With My Gf Because I Am Not Ready To Be Married?
Yes, break up with her if you can’t decide what you want out of a relationship or marriage at this point in your life. You’re young, and there will be other relationships in the future, and it makes sense to wait until you’ve figured yourself out and have your own plans for marriage and children before settling down and tying yourself down.
How to Save A Relationship When She Wants To Break Up?
Tell your girlfriend that time apart from each other is necessary for us because of something else in our lives or relationship. This is not because of you not wanting to be with her. It’s because something else in our lives or relationship is necessary, and we need time apart from each other.
The Bottom Line
It’s important to think about your future relationship and marriage just like you think about where you want to be and what you want to do in life. Don’t think about it like other people, and society is “telling” you to think about it. Think about it for yourself and make your own plans.
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