A lot of times, when a guy says he doesn’t want a relationship right now, there’s actually more going on that you might not know about.
When it comes down to it, every man has their own reasons for not wanting to be in a relationship with someone.
It’s important that you take the time to get to know each other and figure out what the problem is before you make any assumptions!
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Why does he act like my boyfriend but says he doesn’t want a relationship?
I’ve been seeing this guy for a few weeks, and he seems to be really into me. He texts me all the time, we always hang out together, and he wants to have sex with me.
Why is it then that when I ask him if he wants to be my boyfriend or even just date exclusively, he says ‘no?’ Why does he act like my boyfriend but says no in response to more commitment? In this blog post, you could find the possible reasons and solutions:
He’s afraid of relationships because of the amount of ‘responsibility’ they require
When a guy says he doesn’t want to be in a relationship right now, it’s not always because of you. When they say this, sometimes what they really mean is that they’re afraid of the responsibility that comes with being in a committed long-term relationship and aren’t ready for all of the things that come along with it or don’t know what they want because they don’t know if you’re serious.
If this is the case, it’s important to take some time and figure out who he really is outside of a relationship with you. When you do this, make sure that your expectations are realistic (i.e., not wanting him to be different from who he is). When you do this, if he’s just not ready to be in a relationship yet and is afraid of commitment, he’ll let you know.

He’s a ‘committed bachelor
When a guy says he doesn’t want to be in a relationship right now, sometimes it’s because of the amount of time and energy it takes. When this is the case, they’re not really interested in being committed to just one person for their entire life, so setting them up on dates with other people makes sense.
When you do this, make sure that you have a candid conversation with them about what they’re looking for in the future. When they know this, it will help them to figure out whether or not being committed is something they want to do at some point.
There’s someone else
When a guy says he doesn’t want to be in a relationship right now, it could also just mean that there’s someone else. When they say this, it means they’re not really interested in being with you for the long term and are trying to get out of their commitment by coming up with an excuse about why they don’t want to be in a relationship with you.

When this is the case, it’s important to have conversations about what you want and need as well as communicate openly to make sure that he understands your expectations for their future commitment level.
You’re not triggering his hero instinct
When a guy says he doesn’t want to be in a relationship right now, it could mean that you’re not triggering his hero instinct. When they say this, sometimes what they really mean is that there are other things going on emotionally for them, and when these issues get resolved, the idea of committing may become more appealing to him.
If this is the case, it’s important to figure out what else is going on for him and find a way to help support him through his struggles.
Things go from intense to nothing
When a guy says he doesn’t want to be in a relationship right now, it could mean that things go from intense to nothing. When this is the case, they’re basically saying that you two don’t spend much time together and when you do, there’s no real connection between the two of you.
When this is the case, work on building a stronger connection and making sure that you make time to spend together. When he realizes what he’s missing, the idea of being in a committed relationship with someone else may no longer be so appealing.
He puts his dreams first
When a guy says he doesn’t want to be in a relationship right now because of his dreams, you need to take some time and figure out what those are. When they know this, it helps them make more sense of their life goals and their relationship with each other.
When you do this, if it seems like the two things don’t coincide, you might want to think about if he’s ready for a relationship. When they know this, it will help them make decisions on how much time and energy they’re willing to spend with you.
He doesn’t spend much time with you
When A Guy Says He Doesn’t Want A Relationship Right Now, many times, what they really mean is that he’s scared and doesn’t know how to handle commitment.

When this is the case, it can be helpful for you to get him started on something new, so he has more time with you, like going out together or spending some quality time together at home.
When he’s more comfortable with where your relationship is going, this should help him overcome his fears and get over the idea that commitment is scary or difficult.
He doesn’t feel appreciated
When A Guy Says He Doesn’t Want A Relationship Right Now because he doesn’t feel appreciated, it’s important for you to take some time and figure out what that means.
When they know this, if there was an incident in the past where a partner didn’t appreciate him or say thank you enough when something happened for them which made him feel unappreciated, this is something he will bring up when talking about commitment-related issues.
He is scared of commitment
When a guy says he doesn’t want to be in a relationship right now, sometimes they really mean that they’re scared of committing themselves.
When this happens, it’s important not to push them and give him the space he needs until he feels ready for commitment again (i.e., don’t call or text excessively). When you do this, and he’s really scared of commitment, it will show over time.
When this happens, make sure that you’re patient with him because sometimes what they need is just the love and support of someone who cares about them to get them through their fears (i.e., not bugging him or trying to pressure him).
He doesn’t know what he wants because he doesn’t want you
Some men are indecisive about their feelings for you. They want to know that they’re 100% sure before committing, even if the time is now.
If this is the case with your guy friend, then he’s not interested in a committed relationship and will likely never be ready to make it official. All you can do in these cases is make the decision for him and break it off.
If he’s doing this to play with your emotions or because you’re not giving in to his requests fast enough, then know that he isn’t worth any of your time. Move on from him as soon as possible so you can find someone who willfully commits to being in a relationship with you.
He doesn’t want to hurt you
When a guy says he doesn’t want to be in a relationship right now, it’s not always about you. When they say this, sometimes what they really mean is that they don’t want to hurt you and are trying their best not the do anyone any harm because of how easily things can go from intense to nothing all too quickly.
When this happens, it’s important to show him that you’re not going anywhere and will be there for him when he needs someone. When you do this, make sure your expectations are realistic (i.e., don’t get annoyed if he doesn’t call or text back).
He’s been hurt in the past
When a guy says he doesn’t want to be in a relationship right now because of being hurt, it’s important for you to take some time and figure out what that means.

When they know this, if there was an incident in the past that made him feel like he couldn’t trust anyone again because of a betrayal or another reason, these are things that will come up when talking about his feelings with commitment-related issues.
He doesn’t know if you’re serious
When a guy says he doesn’t want to be in a relationship right now, sometimes they really mean that they don’t know if you’re serious about wanting something with them.
When this happens, it’s important not to overwhelm him and give him the space he needs until he feels ready for commitment again (i.e., don’t call or text excessively). When you do this, and he’s really unsure about what you want with him, it will show over time.
He doesn’t want to pay for your dates
When A Guy Says He Doesn’t Want A Relationship Right Now, sometimes they really mean that they’re afraid of paying for it.
When this is the case, it’s important to take some time and figure out all of their feelings about money in general so you can start a conversation with them about where they are financially and how much financial responsibility he wants on their shoulders when it comes to your relationship.
He loves playing the field
Some men want to enjoy the freedom of not being in any type of committed relationship. They can have a lot more women when they don’t commit, and it’s oftentimes easier than having one woman only around them all the time.
This guy doesn’t know what he wants because he just loves playing with your emotions by stringing you along as his side piece.
The only way to get this guy is to make him want something better than what he has at the moment, because once a man knows that he can’t have you, then it’s easy for him to walk away from you and find someone else who will give them what they’re looking for.
He’s made you his backup choice
Some guys are the type that likes to keep their options open. Why? Well, they may not be sure about you, but they’re also not interested in committing to someone else who might just end up being a better option for them.
If this is your guy’s strategy, he will show interest in other girls and then eventually come back to you after he’s convinced himself that you’re the ‘safe choice’.
Women who are in this type of situation need to know when enough is enough. If he’s not ready for a relationship and all he does is keep coming back, then there needs to be some tough love from your end.
You might have loved him at one point but if it looks like he’s just using you as his backup, break it off before giving in one more time.
He doesn’t want things to change
Some guys are afraid of the change that will happen if they enter into a relationship with you. Why? Well, some men like to have their freedom and not deal with any commitments or responsibilities in life.
If this sounds like your guy friend, he’s likely never to want a committed relationship because it means giving up his ways for yours.
You can try to convince him of the good that comes from being in a relationship with you, but it’s best to save your time and move on. Why? Well, if he doesn’t want things to change, then there is no way for his opinion about relationships or committed ones at least will ever change.
He’s Emotionally Unavailable
Some men are emotionally unavailable and can’t have a relationship. Why? Well, these men might not be ready to deal with all that comes from being in a committed partnership, or they might just love the single life too much.
If you’re dating someone who falls into this category, then there is no point wasting your time trying to convince them otherwise. Why? Well, he’s not going to be ready for a relationship, and you deserve someone who will love being with you. You’ll just end up wasting your time if you try to convince him otherwise.
He May Want a Relationship, Just Not With You
Some men may want to have a relationship with you but just not in the way that you’re hoping for. Why? Well, they might be interested in being friends or family-like partners instead of romantic ones. Or maybe they don’t feel like it’s their time yet and is waiting on finding someone else who is better suited for them.
In any case, if your guy is only interested in a friendship or family-like relationship, then you need to know. Why? Simply because the two of you won’t work out long-term, and it’s best to find this out before investing too much time into him.
What do you do when a guy says he doesn’t want a relationship?
There are a number of reasons why he might say this, so you need to delve deeper into the situation before making any conclusions. Why? Well, for one, it’s possible that he doesn’t want a relationship with anyone and is just being honest about his feelings. He may also be afraid of commitment or not have time in his life to commit to a relationship.
You need to ask a guy if he’s sure about what they want and make it clear that you’re not going to be around forever. Why? Either way, your needs are valid, but the two of you will never work out long-term unless there is some sort of compromise on his end.
The Bottom Line
We all know that when a guy says he doesn’t want a relationship right now, it’s code for “I’m not ready to commit.” Instead of being discouraged by his lack of interest in you and moving on, try some creative ways to get him interested.
You could invite your crush out for drinks with friends or take him shopping at the mall. If he still resists your advances after these date ideas, it may be time to let go because there are plenty of other fish in the sea.
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