There are many reasons why won’t he just break up with me. It could be the fear of being alone, he likes having a girl around to make him feel good about himself, or he really does have feelings for you but is uncertain about the relationship.
The best way to find out what is happening and process your emotions is by talking to him about it. Figure out why he does not break up and talk about it.
Table of Contents
10 Reasons Why He Won’t Break Up With You
1. You Keep Knee-Jerk Reacting
Your reaction is always the same “I can’t believe this happens to me again,” “why do I keep getting dumped,” “what is wrong with me?”. Another thing that might be preventing him from breaking up with you is your habit of reacting in ways that are not conducive to a healthy relationship.
When he still shows some interest, you immediately jump to conclusions like it’s all over and he’s already moving on. Once he stopped texting you and then kissing someone else, you immediately concluded that it was over between you.
He might have thought that it was a good way to decide if he wanted to end it without the drama that comes with trying to make him come out and say, “I don’t love you anymore.”
2. You Want Him To Change
This is one of the most common reasons. Your relationship has been going on for a while, and now you want him to change. This is futile as it is not possible to change someone’s nature.
Two aspects of your personality may contribute to his inability to commit. Your dependence and wanting him to always be happy and not knowing how to handle conflict and criticism might drive your expectations away from him.
3. He’s Lonely
Men get lonely too. Sometimes they need time by themselves, especially if they have a lot of friends. They will not break up with you because they feel bad about how you might feel but because they can’t handle your clinginess.
I know this is hard to understand, especially when we think that our boyfriends want to be with us all the time, not just when they are single. However, they feel lonely when they spend a lot of time with you and start missing their friends more.
4. He’s Confused
This is another reason why he won’t break up with you, but it is also the best solution to try if you really want him to break up. The most common cause of confusion in men is alcohol, but it could also be a past relationship that he is not over yet or even that he feels like there are no prospects for marriage or kids in your relationship.
If he starts making stupid decisions because of this confusion, find out what’s bothering him, even if you have to drag the truth out of him or convince him that breaking up will help solve his problems.

5. Love Addiction
This is one of the reasons why he won’t break up with you because it occurs when people meet someone they like and develop a sort of codependency. They need to feel loved by this person, but they feel unhappy if that person leaves them.
There are several symptoms that can help identify whether this is what’s going on between you, such as not wanting to be alone even for short periods of time and the other person feeling trapped in the relationship or even saying, ” let’s see what happens” instead of saying “I love you.”
6. Insecurity About Himself
He may not have come to terms with his true nature yet. He could think that he is not a nice person, has trust issues, or even is a bad boyfriend.
He may need you to reassure him about himself. If this is the case, talk to him about what’s bothering him and try to give him something positive to hold on to.
7. Insecurity About You
He may be insecure about you going out with other guys and being jealous or even insecure if in the past you have cheated on him or if your past relationships did not end well.
He might also be insecure if your relationship ended badly before, and this time it seems too good to be true, so he doesn’t want it to end either.
8. You’re Not A Real Girl
We have all heard the saying, “Real men don’t cry,” but this idea has a flip side. How you feel about yourself can make a guy fall for you so hard that he just can’t believe there is no chance for him.
So, if your self-esteem is low (or not high enough), it might affect how he feels about you and think that it’s not worth it to commit to someone who doesn’t feel like a real girl.
9. He Is Desperate For Attention
You need to be real with yourself and know whether or not you came into this relationship as a rebound from a past one that didn’t work out.
If it has been a while since his last relationship ended and he’s still not over it, he might be finding it hard to let go of the idea that there will be another person just as eager for him as you.
10. He Wants To Grow Up
This is probably the most common reason why a guy won’t break up with you, but it also might be the easiest to solve, especially if he is already in your life. This might validate your decision if you have been thinking about being more serious.
He might be afraid that he will lose you if he tells you how he feels. On the other hand, if you just started dating and this is your first serious relationship, he might just want to wait and see what happens in the next few months before making a decision.
The best way to react when your boyfriend doesn’t break up with you is by having the courage to tell him what’s wrong rather than jumping to conclusions. After all, nothing good can come from keeping secrets.
What To Do If He Refuses To Break Up?
After getting over the initial shock and coming to terms with the fact that your boyfriend doesn’t want to break up, you might be wondering what you can do next.
What to do if he refuses to break up:
1. You Shouldn’t Be His Solution
He’s not committed to you, but he is to the idea of having someone. If this is the case, then you should be prepared to lose him. Don’t start doing things that will make him feel more attached to you. Don’t expect him to change his mind.
If your relationship is not going well right now, know that he might end up breaking up with you eventually, so don’t start doing things that will make it worse and hurt you even more, when it happens.
The best way to react when your boyfriend doesn’t break up with you is by having the courage to tell him what’s wrong rather than jumping to conclusions. After all, nothing good can come from keeping secrets.
2. Don’t Be His Escape
He doesn’t want a relationship right now, so don’t expect him to feel that he needs you to escape from his real life. He might be too wounded and lost in his emotions when you start making advances on him that he can’t even see straight.
I know this is hard to take in, but if you love him and respect him by respecting what he wants from your relationship, it will benefit both of you in the long run.
The best way to react when your boyfriend doesn’t break up with you is by having the courage to tell him what’s wrong rather than jumping to conclusions. After all, nothing good can come from keeping secrets.
3. Don’t Force The Relationship
If you start forcing him to make a decision, it might be the moment that he decides to end it. When you listen to what he wants, he will let you know that that’s his answer; if not, he will just make up his mind to let you go because of your overbearing attitude.
The best way to react when your boyfriend doesn’t break up with you is by having the courage to tell him what’s wrong rather than jumping to conclusions. After all, nothing good can come from keeping secrets.
4. Don’t Be Desperate For Love
Tell him: ” I love and care about you, but I don’t have time for something like this right now. I am sorry for what I am about to do, but I am moving on. Don’t worry about me, and don’t hold back on feeling the way you feel. I really hope that one day we will be able to pick up where we left off.”
A lot of people think that it is not a good idea to break up over text or in a Skype call, especially if you have come to terms with the fact that he doesn’t want to break up.
However, it is the best way because you don’t have to see his reaction, and he can’t lie too easily with the help of technology. The way he responds will tell you how he feels.
How Do You Know If Your Boyfriend Is Keeping You As An Option?
It is always better to know if your boyfriend is keeping you as an option for what he wants rather than just assuming that he does. The best way to find out is by asking him directly and being prepared to hear his answer.
If he tells you that he wants to break up but is just not ready for it, be honest with yourself and see if you still want to stay in this relationship.
If he tells you that he wants to end it because of the fact that he wants to be more serious or if you don’t fit the plan of his life, then it is best to end it on good terms because you might become a stepping stone for him in the future.
He Keeps You Around. Now, What Should You Do?
It is not recommended that you stay around and always wait for him to make the decision on his own. If there is something you want in your life, then go for it and stop waiting for him to come back.
One of the reasons why your boyfriend isn’t breaking up with you is because he wants someone to be there at all times. Be honest with yourself and consider whether this is what you want from this relationship. If he tells you that it’s not going to change anything, don’t make the situation worse by making the wrong moves that will hurt both of you.
If you are in an open relationship, then you can just tell him that you are going to move on and find someone else who can be there for you at all times. If not, then it’s time for you to start looking for someone else who will appreciate what you want from a relationship.
Creating A Plan To Break Up With Your Boyfriend
The best way to react when your boyfriend doesn’t break up with you is by having the courage to tell him what’s wrong rather than jumping to conclusions. After all, nothing good can come from keeping secrets.
The first thing you need to do is figure out if something more than a change of heart is preventing your boyfriend from breaking up with you. Ask him why he is not breaking up with you and how you can fix it.
If there isn’t a problem, then you can make up your mind to break up with him. Tell him that you love him but that you think this relationship isn’t worth the trouble of staying together, so you are going to move on and find someone who will appreciate what it means to be in this relationship.
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